Beautiful Stories From Anonymous People

A mother of two talks about her youthful past as a wandering actor and the choices she made to change her life. Geth asks a question in this call that leads to the ultimate "Sorry Sally" moment: How much do Playboy models get paid? This episode is brought to you by Brooklinen (www.brooklinen.com code: BEAUTIFUL), Thomas' English Muffins, and ZipRecruiter (www.ziprecruiter.com/BEAUTIFUL).

An aerialist turned sex education teacher from Australia chats with Gethard about her life on the road, falling in love and the challenge of explaining consent to high school kids. This episode is brought to you by Thomas' English Muffins.

Stuck between two cultures, a punk rocker calls in from the other side of the world to chat about finding his identity, navigating his country's social norms and tells a story about how hard it was to finish a huge American burrito. This episode is brought to you by Talkspace (www.talkspace.com/beautiful) and Tripping.com (www.tripping.com/STORIES).

Coping with tremendous grief from a recent tragedy, an astrophysics researcher talks to Geth about black holes, extraterrestrial life and the fate of humanity. This episode is brought to you by Mack Weldon (www.mackweldon.com code: BEAUTIFUL), Your Mechanic (www.yourmechanic.com/STORIES), Stamps.com (www.stamps.com code: BEAUTIFUL), and Talkspace (www.talkspace.com/beautiful).

A juicy family history, a fast approaching wedding and upcoming gallbladder surgery are on the caller's mind this week and Gethard helps her work through it all. After the call, stay tuned for a 2-year anniversary check-in (and live audience sing-along!) with caller #1, Ron Paul's Baby. This episode is brought to you by Talkspace (www.talkspace.com/beautiful), ZipRecruiter (www.ziprecruiter.com/BEAUTIFUL), and Brooklinen (www.brooklinen.com code: BEAUTIFUL).

How did this self-described East Coast dirtbag go from selling drugs out of his mom's minivan to doing brain surgery? His answer: Donnie Darko. Gethard asks him some hard hitting questions like: What skills acquired in drug dealing are useful as a brain surgeon? Why did he go vegan? Can he control a monkey's brain with a special USB stick? This episode is brought to you by Mack Weldon (www.mackweldon.com code: STORIES), RXBAR (www.rxbar.com/beautiful code: BEAUTIFUL), Talkspace (www.talkspace.com/beautiful), and Care/Of (www.takecareof.com code: STORIES).

Ever heard of "granary bread?" Yeah? Then you're probably British, like this week's caller. If not, then get out your malted barley and listen to Gethard celebrate cultural differences with a mother and social media expert from England's rural south. Opening up about difficulties in her past, she says: "you know, it was 14 years ago, but it's still one of those things, when I open my heart to a stranger on the phone, can still make me cry." This episode is brought to you by Casper Mattresses (www.casper.com/beautiful) and Talkspace (www.talkspace.com/beautiful).

With a combined 200 years of life lived, a retired dentist and an amateur artist chat with Gethard about staying creative as you get older, living a fulfilling life, regrets and the fear of death. One key lesson: travel if you can, but skip The Mona Lisa, it's just not that interesting. This episode is brought to you by Talkspace (www.talkspace.com/beautiful), Your Mechanic (www.yourmechanic.com/STORIES), and Adam and Eve (www.adamandeve.com code: STORIES).

Longtime listeners know: math is Chris Gethard's nemesis. A real-life mathematician calls in and gives Gethard the most thrilling math quiz ever on a podcast. (We feel safe making that claim.) He also talks about his struggle with substances in college and getting sober. Geth also tells a never-before-heard story about an unusual religious ceremony in the rainforest, which involves hallucinogens and terrible diarrhea. This episode is brought to you by Burrow.com (www.burrow.com code: STORIES), Talkspace (www.talkspace.com/beautiful), Stamps.com (www.stamps.com code: BEAUTIFUL), and Brooklinen (www.brooklinen.com code: BEAUTIFUL).

Headed to her first chemotherapy treatment after a recent cancer diagnosis, this young woman is naturally a little stressed and nervous. However, spirits are soon lifted in a call that includes stories of haunted apartments, puns and a doctor's note to party. This episode is brought to you by Merge Records (www.mergerecords.com code: BEAUTIFUL), Talkspace (www.talkspace.com/beautiful), Adam and Eve (www.adamandeve.com code: STORIES), and RXBAR (www.RXBAR.com/stories code: STORIES).

A man narrates his stroll though a Wal-Mart. As he peruses the aisles, from guns to kitchen appliances, the discussion ranges from philosophical to farcical. This episode is brought to you by Talkspace (www.talkspace.com/beautiful) and Zola (www.zola.com/STORIES).

She does improv, lives in New Jersey and considers herself a "niche person." Needless to say, this week's caller bonds pretty easily with Gethard. She explains what it's like to be on summer break from college and a little boy crazy. This episode is brought to you by ZipRecruiter (www.ziprecruiter.com/BEAUTIFUL), Talkspace (www.talkspace.com/beautiful), and Stamps.com (www.stamps.com code: BEAUTIFUL).

"If anybody has seen hell, it would be me." What starts as an immigrant success story ends up weaving through prostitution, revenge, tragedy, sexuality, morality and religion. Note that this episode contains difficult topics including sexual violence. This episode is brought to you by Talkspace (www.talkspace.com/beautiful), Brooklinen (www.brooklinen.com code: BEAUTIFUL), and HBO's Crashing.

An art school grad talks about his success working in an emerging technological art form. Then, out of nowhere, something happens in this call that changes everything about Gethard's world. This episode is brought to you by Talkspace (www.talkspace.com/beautiful), Audible (www.audible.com/CG), and HBO's Crashing.

Beautiful Anonymous fans called in for a series of brief one minute calls to tell Chris their goals, hopes and plans for 2018.

Can stalking your crush lead to a successful long-term relationship? A young woman tells Gethard about her years-long pursuit. This episode is brought to you by Magoosh (www.magoosh.com code: BEAUTIFUL), Casper Mattresses, Talkspace (www.talkspace.com/beautiful), and Sonos (www.sonos.com).

Unsure of her future, a young German woman finds herself in Australia picking cherries with a group of ex-cons & social outcasts. She passes the phone to a fellow picker and mentor of sorts who opens up about finding solace in the wilderness. He shares some practical tips, like how to hunt and cook wild pig. Hint: Don't use a fishing spear. This episode is brought to you by Sonos (www.sonos.com), Squarespace (www.squarespace.com code: CG), Talkspace (www.talkspace.com/beautiful code: BEAUTIFUL), and Zelle (www.zellepay.com).

The unusual malady that afflicts this caller stirs up a philosophical discussion about how we, as humans, experience and remember our lives and craft our stories. This episode is brought to you by Sock Club, Squarespace, Casper Mattresses, and Zelle.

Gethard has a surprisingly light-hearted chat about death with an expert in the field. This episode is brought to you by Zelle, Talkspace, Hello Fresh, Sock Club, and Brooklinen.

A mother of four tells Gethard about going from med school to motherhood, and how she escaped a troubled marriage with a controlling, manipulative man.

A first year medical student tells Gethard how dissecting dead bodies changed her feelings on death. She opens up about how her mother inspired her to study medicine and some of the worst smells she's encountered, like when she had to dissect a human rectum. Recorded live in Gainesville, Florida. This episode is brought to you by CanvasPop (www.canvaspop.com code: BA50), Sonos (www.sonos.com), and Talkspace (www.talkspace.com/beautiful).

A guy got hit really hard in the head. He tells Gethard all about it. This episode is brought to you by Squarespace (www.squarespace.com code: CG), Talkspace (www.talkspace.com/beautiful), Casper Mattresses (www.casper.com/beautiful), and Brooklinen (www.brooklinen.com code: BEAUTIFUL).

A bonafide geologist tells Geth about fossilized dung fungi and the behind the scenes secrets of the Museum of Natural History. They also talk about how quickly the Earth is dying and weigh the likelihood of colonizing Mars. This episode is brought to you by Sonos (www.sonos.com), Hello Fresh (www.hellofresh.com code: STORIES30), Audible (www.audible.com/esther).

"You can't give puppies cow vaccines." That's how this caller ends her hour with Gethard. The journey to that moment takes us through: Italian Madrigals, getting licked by a baby cow, going on a tour of a cranberry marsh, and a very personal story about the loss of a friend. All this while she's prepping to perform a show that starts right when the call ends. This episode is brought to you by Squarespace (www.squarespace.com code: CG), Talkspace (www.talkspace.com/beautiful), and Sonos (www.sonos.com).

Usually this caller is the one conducting the interview. He's a police officer by trade, but he works a little differently than your average cop. He investigates major crimes including sex crimes, shootings, robberies and murders. He tells Geth about some major cases from his career as well as his opinion on the podcast Serial. This episode is brought to you by Hello Fresh (www.hellofresh.com code: STORIES30), Brooklinen (www.brooklinen.com code: BEAUTIFUL), and Sonos (www.sonos.com).

Gethard has a meandering chit chat with a photographer and former photo developer who details the unusual things people put on film, like nazi motorcycle gang orgies and police crime scene photos. The caller opens up about his interest in the macabre and surprises Geth with his unusual tattoos. This episode is brought to you by Squarespace (www.squarespace.com code: CG), Talkspace (www.talkspace.com/beautiful), and ZIpRecruiter (www.ziprecruiter.com/BEAUTIFUL).

A nice midwestern girl moved to LA. While fixing herself a drink, she tells Gethard tales of porn, vomit, hair extensions and an elopement. This episode is brought to you by Stamps.com (www.stamps.com code: BEAUTIFUL), Casper Mattresses (www.casper.com/BEAUTIFUL), and Sonos (www.sonos.com).

Recently engaged to a deeply Catholic man, this week's caller asks Gethard for some guidance. Also in this week's call: weird stuff at cybernetic garage sales, near death experiences at jury duty, and an answer to the question: How do rabbits react to the sound of Gethard's voice? This episode is brought to you by Mack Weldon (www.mackweldon.com code: BEAUTIFUL), Talkspace (www.talkspace.com/beautiful), and Magoosh (www.magoosh.com code: BEAUTIFUL).

Today's caller is a dad with two sons who just dropped his 5 year old off for his first day of Kindergarten and he and his wife have their first couples therapy appointment that afternoon. The caller says that recent professional changes, growing confidence and a desire to get more out of life are driving him and wife apart but Gethard notices him expressing strong feelings toward a female coworker. This episode is brought to you by Magoosh (www.magoosh.com code: BEAUTIFUL), Squarespace (www.squarespace.com code: CG), ZipRecruiter (www.ziprecruiter.com/BEAUTIFUL), and Hello Fresh (www.hellofresh.com code: STORIES30).

Today's caller was injured by grenade shrapnel as a young child and brought to the U.S. by her mother to receive medical treatment. She tells Chris about her family's experience living through an extended civil war and building a life in the United States. This episode is brought to you by Sonos (www.sonos.com), Talkspace (www.talkspace.com/beautiful), Casper Mattresses (www.casper.com/BEAUTIFUL), and Magoosh (www.magoosh.com code: BEAUTIFUL).

Santería, possible mafia connections and digestive troubles are a part of this week's caller's complicated family history. Calling from a Dunkin' Donuts bathroom, this rambunctious fun-loving bartender tells Chris hilarious, bizarre, and gross anecdotes about her family, drunken adventures, and her pro golfer BF. This episode is brought to you by Squarespace (www.squarespace.com code: CG), Magoosh (www.magoosh.com code: BEAUTIFUL), Stamps.com (www.stamps.com code: BEAUTIFUL), and ZipRecruiter (www.ziprecruiter.com/BEAUTIFUL).

Iconic journalist Katie Couric joins Gethard as guest co-host. They chat with a college student in an early stage of major life changes. The caller bravely opens up about some very personal and emotional stuff...and also talks about having a unique emotional connection to Gethard because she's seen people eat burritos off of his belly. This episode is brought to you by Talkspace (www.talkspace.com/beautiful), RXBAR (www.rxbar.com/beautiful code: BEAUTIFUL), Magoosh (www.magoosh.com code: BEAUTIFUL), and Sonos (www.sonos.com).

Eight months pregnant and she loves messing with people, this week's caller is celebrating her birthday on Beautiful Anonymous. She tells Gethard about some pregnancy-driven life hacks. Controversial birthing practices? They go there. This episode is brought to you by Talkspace (www.talkspace.com/beautiful), Squarespace (www.squarespace.com code: CG), Blue Apron (www.blueapron.com/beautiful), and Bound to Delight (www.bookofthemonth.com/stories).

An African American military vet living in Charlottesville discusses the recent protests in his town. He tells Chris about confronting KKK rallies and how to deal with white supremacists. He's also playing Mario Kart and really hates Peach. This episode is brought to you by ZipRecruiter (www.ziprecruiter.com/BEAUTIFUL), Talkspace (www.talkspace.com/beautiful), and Brooklinen (www.brooklinen code: BEAUTIFUL).

Having dealt with mental health issues and an eating disorder this caller now helps others confront those problems. She tells Chris about the repercussions of coming out in a small town, and the two discuss their strategies for dealing with anxiety, including the best funny animal videos on YouTube. This episode is brought to you by Talkspace (www.talkspace.com/beautiful), Casper Mattresses (www.casper.com/BEAUTIFUL), Stamps.com (www.stamps.com code: BEAUTIFUL), and Book of The Month: Bound to Delight (www.bookofthemonth.com/STORIES).

Sasquatch. Bigfoot. Skunk-Ape. Yeti. Whatever you want to call it, this week's caller is on the hunt. A homeschooled paranormal enthusiast, he tells Chris about some of the things he believes in. This episode is brought to you by Talkspace (www.talkspace.com/beautiful), The Butterfly Effect with Jon Ronson (www.audible.com/butterfly), Brooklinen (www.brooklinen.com code: BEAUTIFUL), and Honest Tea (www.honesttea.com/podcast).

An Aussie opens up about his family's history which includes tales of drug dealing, substance abuse, mental illness, sex addiction and trying to find God in a hot yoga studio. Something really special clicks between Gethard and the caller, and not just because Americans love an Australian accent. Recorded in front of a live audience in Baltimore, Maryland on June 11, 2017. This episode is brought to you by ZipRecruiter (www.ziprecruiter.com/BEAUTIFUL) and Book of the Month: Bound to Delight (www.bookofthemonth.com/STORIES).

What college major could possibly involve writing an academic paper comparing the 1968 film "The Parent Trap" with the 1998 remake starring Lindsay Lohan? It could only be Gethard's major, American Studies! This week's caller chats about what it's like to be an American Studies major during the Trump era and Chris shows off his talent for generating a good thesis. This episode is brought to you by Talkspace (www.talkspace.com/beautiful), Redbox (www.redbox.com/games code: STORIES5), Brooklinen (www.brooklinen.com code: BEAUTIFUL), Blue Apron (www.blueapron.com/beautiful), and Bound to Delight (www.bookofthemonth.com/STORIES).

Calling in from a tattoo parlor, this week's caller is getting inked up to commemorate a grim experience. Some wild tattoo stories are told as the phone gets passed around. Secret family drama gets dissected: an estranged brother, internet stalking, rumors of the mafia. This episode is brought to you by Redbox (www.redbox.com/games code: STORIES4), Squarespace (www.squarespace.com code: CG), Stamps.com (www.stamps.com code: BEAUTIFUL), and HBO's Insecure.

A mother calls in from a children's hospital while waiting for her daughter's test results. Gethard & the caller shed some tears while discussing tragedy, sickness, pain and suffering. But it's not all sad. Birthday parties, gelato, Disney World and other awesome things come up. This episode is brought to you by Talkspace (www.talkspace.com/beautiful), Redbox (www.redbox.com/games code: STORIES3), Casper Mattresses (www.casper.com/BEAUTIFUL code: BEAUTIFUL), Book of the Month: Bound to Delight (www.bookofthemonth.com/STORIES), and ZipRecruiter (www.ziprecruiter.com/BEAUTIFUL).

Gethard chats with a Soprano. As in the highest of the four singing voices in Opera, not a character from a popular HBO show. The caller speaks about troubled relationships from her past and, even more troubling, a serious childhood trauma. (Trigger warning: discussion related to childhood sexual abuse.) This episode is brought to you by Redbox (www.redbox.com/games), Honest Tea (www.honesttea.com/podcast), Away (www.awaytravel.com/stories), Thumbtack (www.thumbtack.com).

On her lunch break, today's caller engages in some light hearted chit chat about office gossip and her (sometimes frustrating) side gig as a wedding photographer. But then, when a hot button political issue comes up, things start to get heated. This episode is brought to you by Redbox (www.redbox.com/games code: STORIES), Subaru (www.meetanowner.com), Talkspace (www.talkspace.com/beautiful), and Hulu Plus (www.huluplus.com).

Ever wonder what it's like to be paid to secretly watch shoppers on camera? This week's caller works in the retail field of "loss prevention." He tells Gethard about the time he confronted a shoplifter and got punched in the face, and discusses how the American heroin epidemic is directly correlated with retail theft. Plus, Gethard hears a little bit about the caller's unorthodox personal life. This episode is brought to you by Talkspace (www.talkspace.com/beautiful), Hulu Plus, Blue Apron (www.blueapron.com/beautiful), Squarespace (www.squarespace.com code: CG).

This week's caller is a somewhat unconventional podcast fan. He loves Beautiful/Anonymous even though he's never technically heard an episode. Hmmm. Mysterious. He shares his unique experience with the medium, his outlook on life, and his best party tricks.  This episode is brought to you by Talkspace (www.talkspace.com/beautiful), Hulu Plus, ZipRecruiter (www.ziprecruiter.com/BEAUTIFUL), Casper Mattresses (www.casper.com/BEAUTIFUL), Where Should We Begin? with Esther Perel (www.audible.com/Esther), and Detour (www.detour.com/BEAUTIFUL).

A poet-to-be calls in to the Beautiful Anonymous live tour. She and Gethard get off to a slow start. That might work in the studio, but the live audience gets a little restless! So the caller turns to the people closest to her to help ramp up the excitement. This episode is brought to you by Mack Weldon (www.mackweldon.com code: BEAUTIFUL), Detour (www.detour.com/beautiful) and Talkspace (www.talkspace.com/beautiful).

Struggling to realize her creative ambitions in early adulthood, this week's caller confronted body image issues when younger. Gethard gives her a pep talk and discusses the challenge of being creative while dealing with other people's judgement. This episode is brought to you by Talkspace (www.talkspace.com/beautiful), Where Should We Begin? with Esther Perel from Audible (www.audible.com/Esther), and Detour (www.detour.com/beautiful).

Raised in a tumultuous household and married at eighteen to the pastor's son, today's caller was divorced before she turned twenty. Betrayal, love triangles and shotgun deaths are all a part of the wild ride that she's lived in her twenty-six years. This episode is brought to you by Mack Weldon (www.mackweldon.com code: BEAUTIFUL), Squarespace (www.squarespace.com code: CG), Detour (www.detour.com/BEAUTIFUL), and Talkspace (www.talkspace.com/beautiful).

Against the odds, a caller from one of the earliest, most listened-to calls manages to get through for a second time. Unprecedented! The caller gives Gethard an update on what's happened in his life since his first call over a year ago. They chat about dealing with internet commenters (which might instigate some more internet comments). This episode is brought to you by Talkspace (www.talkspace.com/beautiful), Blue Apron (www.blueapron.com/beautiful), Casper Mattresses (www.casper.com/beautiful), and ZipRecruiter (www.ziprecruiter.com/BEAUTIFUL).

Big parties with lawyers gathered around piles of cocaine. Inequality in the criminal justice system. Huge corporations ripping off the families of jailed inmates. Gethard talks to a public defender about these topics, and discovers her favorite word: alleged. This episode is brought to you by Talkspace (www.talkspace.com/beautiful) and Adam and Eve (www.adamandeve.com code: STORIES).

One hour ago, in the rain, this week's caller experienced her first kiss. She tells Gethard about the high school experience in 2017 covering the new (Snapchat, group texting, nerd culture being cool) and the established (SATs, teen pregnancy, crushes). She also explains how writing Harry Potter fan fiction in the 6th grade led to her current hobby, writing romance novels. This episode is brought to you by Subaru (www.meetanowner.com), Talkspace (www.talkspace.com/beautiful), and Adam and Eve (www.adamandeve.com code: STORIES).