Adulting with Michelle Buteau and Jordan Carlos

This week, Michelle and Jordan catch up with comedian and actor, Langston Kerman aka "Beige Rage." Michelle explains why to be a parent is to lead a double life, Jordan shares the secret to his parents’ long marriage, and Langston recounts how a TV pilot he once shot with Michelle in Vancouver didn’t quite pan out, but why the memories of seafood towers they inhaled together will last forever. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This week, Jordan and Michelle catch up LIVE with comedian Matteo Lane. Jordan tells a personal story about a hero in his family and Matteo explains how he once met his hero, Mariah Carey — along with a makeup brush attached to nothing that follows her around. What? Yes. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Live at the Bell House, Michelle and Jordan welcome actor, comedian and TV personality, Bevy Smith. Michelle shuts it down with her own “big titty Ted Talk!" Jordan describes the exquisite joy of being a completionist, and Bevy shares the joy of taking ALL the pleasures seriously — namely the one she wished she would have indulged in her 20s (AKA smashing Tupac!!!!). See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Live at the Bell House, Jordan and Michelle welcome comedian/actor/writer, Roy Wood Jr. Jordan shares why he once got whacked on the head with a whole-ass chicken while breaking up a subway fight, and Michelle shakes her head at the sheer volume of cheetah sneakers at the US Open, while Roy breaks down the joy of raising a renaissance kid in New York City. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This week, Michelle and Jordan break it down with comedian/writer/act-OR, Chanel Ali. Jordan tells an unfortunate tale of finding a literal shit stain in a Mississippi hotel room (like ya do!), Michelle and Chanel discover a shared love for quiet, strong "boom operators" - shouts to Sade! And Chanel reveals the biggest surprise of all: AARP cards aren't just for your grandparents -- single, young ladies, get you an AARP no MATTER your age! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This week, Michelle and Jordan are all up in the Bell House with comedian/writer, Rae Sanni. Michelle, who has never seen Jordan drunk, encourages him to get “white girl wasted" already! Jordan unpacks how to take the high road with irresponsible dog owners whose dogs are into to pee-play. And Rae tells a story of meeting a hottie fireman in her burning apartment building… #toohotforTV! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This week, Jordan and Michelle welcome writer/producer/human, Sudi Orestia Credenza Cobalt Onomatopoeia Green (not her real name - just Sudi Green - but what if it was, y'all???). Michelle explains the joy of an appropriately-sized bath towel, Jordan learns about the bond between women with them curly bangs, and Sudi dishes about surviving six seasons writing for SNL, “husband trapping” jeans, and the glory of post-pandemic bras. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Recorded live at the Bell House in BK, Michelle and Jordan kiki with FOP (friend of the pod - AND SO MUCH MORE!!!) Aparna Nancherla (suh. many. credits!). Michelle asks whether it's shabby to use other people’s wet wipes, Jordan reveals there’s such a thing as Good Ball Days and Bad Ball Days (Who knew??!), and Aparna contemplates becoming a white male catfisher. We're all just tryna figure it out, y'all! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This week, Jordan and Michelle catch up with comedian/writer/cult-survivor/Jordan's WORK COLLEAGUE, Moses Storm. Michelle explains why she's not surprised at all her husband bought a boat, Jordan marvels about the vast number of throuples in Minneapolis, and Moses asks the biggest question of all: What should we believe in when religion (or a cult) doesn't do it for you anymore? Bad answers only! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This week, Michelle and Jordan kiki with comedian/writer/roller skater, Solomon Georgio. Jordan shares a professional highlight, Michelle breaks down being a writers room B-O-S-S, and Solomon explains why he dreams of dating the men of Copenhagen! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Recorded live at The Bell House in Brooklyn, Jordan and Michelle kiki with comedian/writer, Matt Bellassai and actor/comedian, Yamaneika Saunders. Michelle discovers why Jordan *actually* enjoys his online exercise videos, Matt explains why an unscheduled FaceTime when dating is a red flag, while Yamaneika shares a cautionary tale about flying direct from Fort Lauderdale to Newark. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This week, Michelle and Jordan commune remotely with friend, actor and comedian, Jeff Hiller. Michelle gives Jordan shit for his numerous Texas-isms, and Jordan and Jeff reminisce about meeting on a movie set, wherein Jordan mistakenly "offed" Greg Kinnear with an AC, and Jeff ran around Manhattan as a naked ghost. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Live at the Bell House, Jordan and Michelle catch up with writer, comedian and TV host, Jordan Klepper. Jordan and Michelle break down their favorite summer jams, and Jordan Klepper describes the scariest new-parent moment he’s had while mistakenly high on edibles. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

In this live Adulting show, Michelle and Jordan catch up with friend and stand-up comedian, Nore Davis. Michelle shares a story about getting in a fight in a coat line in Amsterdam, and Nore gets real about parenting, homeschooling his daughter, and getting over a toxic relationship by wandering a beach in Mexico. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

In this episode of Adulting, Jordan and Michelle talk with friend, comedian, actor and writer, Ilana Glazer. Jordan shares a harrowing wallet recovery tale, and Ilana reveals why she dressed as a cow at Michelle's Halloween party. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

In this live, two-guest episode of Adulting, Michelle and Jordan talk to comedian and writer, Josh Johnson, and actor and writer, Larry Owens. Michelle and Jordan learn why Josh is scared of teenagers, and Larry shares his secret to home décor. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

In this live episode of Adulting, comedian Sarah Cooper explains how our worst president ever actually saved her life, and Jordan and Michelle get real about balancing careers and parenting. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

In Jordan and Michelle's studio conversation with Shalewa Sharpe, they learn about Shalewa's inspiring, later-in-life journey in stand-up, and why strip clubs in Atlanta always serve chicken wings. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

In this live episode of Adulting, Jordan and Michelle kiki with the inspirational ALOK. Among other things, they discuss ALOK's Texas roots, the perils of dating as a certified genius, how much fun it will be to dress ALOK'S future child -- the heels alone, hunny! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

On the Exactly Right premiere of Adulting, Michelle and Jordan catch up with their friend and Irish comic, Maeve Higgins. Together, they explain why a shared love of butter equals romance in Ireland, when it’s ok to turn down being a bridesmaid, and Maeve makes Jordan very uncomfortable by revealing she is actually his stepmother. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

After a two year hiatus, Adulting with Michelle Buteau and Jordan Carlos is back, now on the Exactly Right Network! Michelle and Jordan provide real life advice with a heaping portion of hilarity topped with a dollop of truth. Their conversations with comics, experts, and celebs answer listeners' most complex questions about all things adulting. Want Michelle and Jordan to answer YOUR adulting questions? Send them to [email protected]. Be sure to follow the show on Instagram @adultingthepod. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

For the season finale, Jordan and Michelle sit down with Irish comedian Aisling Bea, the creator and star of the new Hulu series This Way Up, and talk about what it takes to make sad s**t into something funny. Then we go behind the scenes with DJ Donwill and producer Christian Banda as they tackle some of the toughest Adulting questions of the season. Plus, Jordan reveals the one question that he wants to ask his parents (and it’s gross). See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

While Michelle visits the Delta Sky Club, another family crashes Jordan’s family reunion and eats all the gumbo. Comedian Aparna Nancherla shares her life motto “Another day, another dread.” Transgender supermodel Geena Rocero learns how to speak her truth, and The Read’s Crissle West may not hug you, but she will share her weed. Plus: Jordan gets the one thing he’s always wanted in New York. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Michelle accidentally stays at a plantation for her birthday. Oops! The Daily Show’s Jaboukie Young-White comes out to his parents on national television. And Full Frontal host Samantha Bee spills on her rebellious past. Plus, Jordan is shocked to learn something new about Michelle. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Feeling flirty? Michelle and Jordan are not having it. Plus, Joyelle Nicole Johnson explains why she had to break the law to go to school. Giulia Rozzi likes an expensive break-up. And Becky Veduccio shares both the heartbreak and joy on her journey to motherhood. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

While Jordan was busy summering in Maine, Michelle got stuck in a New Orleans toilet. Who had a better vacation? You decide. Plus, The Daily Show’s Michael Kosta will eat just about anything. And Alternatino creator and star Arturo Castro on why salsa clubs make him feel inadequate. Plus, one man’s quest to turn Uber Pool into a dating app. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This week, Jordan and Michelle are joined by the legendary Vanessa Williams. Yes, that Vanessa Williams - and she gives some adulting advice that will change your life forever. Plus, Comedy Knockout’s Damien Lemon finds out he’s married, Michelle gets high on mushrooms and sees Jesus, and Jordan goes on a nightmarish New York adventure. And advice on how to go on a coffee date without having to drop a deuce. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This week, take a walk down memory lane to a time when Michelle sold zoot suits and Jordan used Civil War trivia as a pick-up line. Comedian Gina Yashere channels her inner James Bond. And Liza Treyger may just be the Lindsay Lohan of comedy. Plus, Michelle and Jordan tackle that age-old question: are you ever too old to Seamless a bagel when you’re hungover? See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Being a true adult means being a good community member. This week, while Jordan saves some trees, Michelle shares her one and only experience with communal living: a roommate who loved olive oil and left a mess. Comedian Kerry Coddett tries to end her dating dry spell. And talk show host Michelle Collins auditions for her dream role as Javert in Les Mis. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Part of being an adult is knowing how to negotiate. This week, Jordan drives a hard bargain with his new roof guy, while Michelle talks her husband into a mani-pedi. Black Thought from The Roots interrupts date night with his wife to share his s*** list. And comedian Seth Herzog and Michelle compare notes on having twins (yes, he does have a favorite). See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Tensions run high as Jordan calls out Michelle for being bougie AF. They are joined by comedian Alzo Slade for a conversation about meat sweats, and MTV’s Franchesca Ramsey refuses to sniff Michelle Obama. Plus, practical tips for getting out of your friends' invitations. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Jordan Carlos and Michelle Buteau believe that a true adult’s worth can be measured by one unit only - the amount of milk in your fridge. Plus, Michelle tries to avoid walking the dog, while Jordan continues to struggle with his pants. Wet Hot American Summer’s Michael Ian Black is glad his son thinks he’s lame, First Wives Club’s Malik Yoba calls someone out over a Kit Kat, and Orange is the New Black’s Jessica Pimentel becomes the lead singer of a metal band (seriously)! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Sometimes part of being an adult is unloading toxic energy in your life - let this episode be your guide. Special guest Danielle Brooks from Orange is the New Black never lets anyone steal her light, while Saturday Night Live cast member Chris Redd trashes someone’s office (deservedly). Plus, comedian Yamaneika Saunders offers up a master class in ending those friendships that just aren’t working. And Michelle shares some big news! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Jordan gets a brutal lesson in Adulting when he faces off with a mouse, while Michelle tells the gospel truth to a hesitant dater. Plus, Nore Davis remembers his worst bullies, Sara Schaefer gets brave in the Grand Canyon, and Ben Sinclair loses his virginity at camp and gets a special souvenir. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Michelle and Jordan dig into some Adulting relationship basics. Rule number one: Don’t pay for a date’s drink entirely with quarters. Rule number two: Never fight with your partner in front of friends. They are joined by Sasheer Zamata who meets a magic witch at Afropunk and Kate Walsh explains why she was a “human mullet” in high school. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Michelle and Jordan’s struggles with Adulting continue. Michelle shares a harrowing tale from a haunted bed and breakfast, while Jordan revisits a traumatic kickball experience. Plus, comedian Chris Distefano tries to protect a Brooklyn woman from a confrontation in an elevator and Jim Gaffigan explains how he ended up with so many kids. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Welcome to Adulting! The show where hosts Michelle Buteau and Jordan Carlos help us figure out how to grow the f**k up. Together. In this inaugural episode, Michelle and Jordan plan Naomi Ekperigin’s entire wedding in under a minute, Wyatt Cenac does his best muppet impression, and Phoebe Robinson shares some bathroom etiquette tips (which involve an open flame). Plus, some advice on what to do if you’re catching feelings for your dealer. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.